I Surrender All

There's nothing like spending a week with your best friends at a camp where God is the main focus. Those weeks where everyone is expecting God to do a work in their hearts. He never fails to show up and go above and beyond what we ask. So here's what he did in me this past week while was at camp.

I have been struggling with doubt for a little over a year now. Satan tries to distract me with lies and unbelief that God does not really exist and everything that I have believed all my life is a joke. These doubts come in waves and a week before camp I started getting those same lies into my head again. I was nervous. Nervous that it would continue on through camp and I was going to have to be fighting Satan the whole week. 

I was fighting the first two nights of camp. Fighting to focus during worship and fighting to believe what the pastors were preaching. One night during small group, my leader asked us to take some time and journal what God was saying to us. I sat there for a really long time not really sure what to right down because I wasn't sure what God was saying. Then I heard him say, "Give it to me." It suddenly hit me then that I had only prayed about my problem and asked God to fix it. I had never fully surrendered it to God for him to completely take care of it.

So I gave it to God in prayer and immediately felt a weight lift from my shoulders. It felt freeing to know that I would not have to deal with this problem alone anymore. 

After fully surrendering it to God I was able to worship more passionately without as much distraction and I was able to focus during the messages without giving in to unbelief. Why? Because it's not my problem anymore, God is going to manage it in his own way.

If waves of unbelief come flooding back to me, I will continue to worship God and grow in His Word because God has a plan and he will use it for my good even when I don't understand.